Imagine 101 of these!!!

Yes that really is a dalmation riding a bike.

Hat tip: Sophie

Chirac taken down by depressed Maul-tese pet dog

From Perez Hilton:

Woof! That must have hurt!

According to new reports, 76-year old former French president, Jacques Chirac, was hospitalized after he was mauled by his 'clinically depressed', little, white Maltese pooch, Sumo. Yes, Sumo as in the Japanese sport. The ex-pres was apparently fascinated by sumo wrestling!

The elder statesman is expected to make a full recovery. Can we just pause for a minute, though. How the fuck is a dog "clinically depressed"?????? And how do you treat that????

The former president's wife, Bernadette, told the media, "The dog went for him for no apparent reason. We were already aware the animal was unpredictable and is actually being treated with pills for depression. My husband was bitten quite badly, but he is certain to make a full recovery over the coming weeks."

Mrs. Chirac did not reveal where on his body the former pres was attacked. Sumo was given to Chirac as a gift from his gandson. What's going to happen to Sumo? Eternal sleep????

It's a hen, for cluck's sake!

Yet another outbreak of cross-species canoodling! (see here and here)

The Pakistan Daily Times reports:

A hen in China has reportedly shacked up with a dog to help raise its three newborn puppies.

Owner Yang said the hen moved into the dog’s kennel after it gave birth last month. Since then, the hen refuses to leave the kennel, staying inside all day and only walking out when the dog is nursing its puppies.

Yang says the hen is very protective of the puppies and refuses to allow strangers to come close to the kennel. The dog seems to have given up the idea of driving the stubborn intruder out and has decided to share the space with the hen.

That hen is doggone crazy! But the dog might be feeling a tad hen-picked...

My name is Bronx. I'm a bulldog. And I'm an alcoholic.

Metro has the shocking story of a dog forced to become an alcoholic:

A man who plied a dog with Stella Artois lager has received the first ever conviction for getting a dog drunk.

Andrew Wilson, 31, of Bristol, gave American bulldog Bronx a can of Stella Artois beer and was accused of forcing him to drink vodka before giving the hound a beating.

By the time he was found he was over the drink drive limit for a human, it has been reported.

Outfoxed by smelly 'dog'

From the wires:

A Chinese man was shocked to discover the dog he had raised from a pup was actually a rare Arctic fox.

Zhang, of Tunkou, bought what he thought was an all-white Pomeranian dog for £60 a year ago on a business trip. But he found the dog hard to tame, it would often bite him and had several unusual traits, he told the Wuhan Evening Post.

"It can't bark but instead makes little 'em em' noises, and its tail has been growing longer and longer," he said. "The most annoying thing is that starting this summer, the dog became very smelly. Even when we gave it a daily shampoo bath, the smell was still strong."

Zhang took his 'dog' to a local zoo for answers, and it turned out the dog is actually an Arctic fox, a protected rare species. He has now donated the animal to the zoo.

Woolly-brained sheep thinks it's a dog!

Tinkerbell brings new meaning to the word 'sheepdog'. Although Tinkerbell is a sheep, she believes she's a dog after being raised alongside Hamish the Labrador, Thomas the Terrier and two other dogs.

Unsheeplike behaviour engaged in by this woolly confusion include:

• going for walks
  
• bonding with a child
  
• stalking a family
  
• attending tea parties
  
• going to pre-school
  
• having christmas dinner - at the table!
  

'Tinks' sadly was born with impaired eyesight and brain damage. Maybe these disablities explain her strange activities!

It must be puppy love

Fox news reports on a doggone miracle story:

A newborn baby that was abandoned outdoors by her 14-year-old mother during the Argentina winter was found safe Thursday after being kept alive and warm by a mother dog and her brood of puppies, Reuters reported.

Farmer Fabio Anze found the naked baby near the city of La Plata, Argentina, lying amongst his dog China’s puppies. The baby was taken to the hospital after Anze called the authorities.

Hospital officials said the baby was only a few hours old when she was found, and was in good health despite several bruises.

For fans of the moving image, the BBC has a video.

Avid readers of Animal News may notice a similarity between this heart-warming story and that of our recent post about a female dog nursing a litter of orphaned kittens.

We think China must be one of many hounds of love!

Another cat hitches a ride

The BBC reports on Tilly, yet another cat to get trapped in an inappropriate part of a car. In common with our exposé on cats that get trapped in engines, Tilly has also managed to hitch a long distance ride with an unsuspecting motorist.

A cat has used up one of its nine lives after getting stuck behind the front grille of a car and surviving for 70 miles on a trip from Surrey to Sussex.

Now that we are at 15 incidents, Animal News is starting to wonder whether these events are more than a coincedence... Is all this car tres-puss orcherstrated by a master mog? Are we dealing with feline felony here?

And it's not just cats that like to travel! In related news, Hike the Border Collie became estranged from his owner when he caught a bus for a 20 mile trip to the seaside. One local resident quipped: "He must be barking mad to take the number 11 bus. He should have used a taxi."

Spending all day at the seaside sounds like a dog's life to us!

Fat Cats

From Yahoo News:

Eight of Britain's most overweight pets are to embark on a 100-day diet and fitness regime in a bid to be crowned this year's pet fit club champion.

The seven dogs and one cat, who are all more than 30 percent overweight and weigh a combined total of 191 kg (421 lb), were picked by veterinary charity PDSA who are running the slimming contest.

The animals, who need to lose a total of 74 kg to reach their ideal weight, will be put on specially tailored diet and exercise programs.

The pet who achieves the biggest percentage weight loss and best follows their new regime will be crowned champion, winning their owner a pet-friendly holiday.

At the hour of the Credit Crunch, it's apparently not only corporate fat cats that are shedding a few pounds!

UPDATE: Link is now broken, see a copy of the story here.

Bird got the blues

From the Mail:

Spare a thought for Fred the parrot, who was so heartbroken by the death of his owner that he's been prescribed an animal-friendly version of the anti-depressant.

The African Grey got the blues after owner George Dance's passing - and ended up biting all his neck feathers off before animal experts offered the radical solution.

The bird has now been prescribed a twice-daily liquid dose of a bird-friendly version of Prozac, called Clomicalm.

Other recent cases of animals being given mental health treatment include

collie-Labrador Winnie, who last year was given Clomicalm after being diagnosed with canine separation anxiety.

Sad.

Bizarre friendship frenzy

In the wake of our recent post on unlikely animal friendships, a veritable pandemic of interspecies chumminess has been brought to the attention of Animal News. Be inspired!

tortoise + hippo
An orphaned hippo in kenya has been adopted by a giant tortoise, in a mutually beneficial display of animal friendship. It is said of the tortoise: "motherhood has really brought her out of her shell!"


chimp + tiger cubs
Anjana, a chimpanzee, has adopted two tiger cubs in Florida.



elephant + sheep
From metro:

Themba the abandoned baby elephant has someone to give him that warm, fuzzy feeling at long last – Albert the sheep.

The six-month-old was introduced to Albert, two, after he was orphaned with little hope of survival.

Despite a few teething problems, the two are now best friends, and spend hours playing and cuddling.

dog + monkey
From the New York Post:

It was love at first sight for a puppy and a monkey at a zoo in China.

A worker at the Nanhai Zoo who takes her 6-month-old pooch with her to work noticed the pup and the monkey had an instant attraction.

Now the tiny simian feeds the canine bananas and brushes his hair, and the dog lets his pal ride on his back.

That really is bananas!

dog + kittens
From the wires:

A female dog is nursing a litter of kittens which were orphaned when their mother died in China.

Their owner, Cai, of Jiangmen, said he has been raising cats and dogs together for more than 10 years, and they all got along together well. But this was the first time he had ever seen kittens being nursed by a dog, he told the local Guangzhou Daily.

The four kittens seemed happy and content with their new mother's milk, while the dog was tending to its adopted family with love and care, Cai added.

"Several days ago, the kittens' mother died after eating a poisoned rat, leaving behind a litter of kittens without a source of milk," he said. "The kittens' cries may have stirred the dog's maternal nature, since it too had recently given birth. It volunteered to take over and feed the kittens of its old friend."

The dog's own puppies had been taken away by one of its grown-up offspring. Cai said: "That's perhaps another reason why the dog adopted the kittens. She lost all of her own children."

rabbit + kittens
The BBC reports on Summer the Rabbit, of Aberdeen, who has adopted six three-week old kittens.

Veterinary nurse Melanie Humble says: "the kittens seemed to really like her [Summer] and thought she was their mother. They were trying to get milk from her and climbing over her. And Summer was not bothered by them at all. Summer is five months old and she's gigantic. It is lovely to see them all together."

Stand up for the pub bitch

Progress is slowly being made against the anti-animal discrimination which is rife in the public bars of Britain. Hatty the Lakeland terrier was barred from the Jolly Sailor in Prestatyn accused of chewing the beer mats. However the landlord had a change of mind after anger from regulars.

"I came down one night and all the regulars were throwing beer mats for her so really speaking, we shouldn't be blaming Hatty, we should be blaming the regulars," reported the landlord.

However the landlord now demands poor Hatty should undergo humiliating treatment and wear a high-vis vest whilst in the pub. Amazing animal news is outraged that the dog should undergo this treatment and sugguest that the regulars should be wearing the vests. Please support this cause and join our petition by phoning 0845 600 5705.

To the big kennel in the sky

The winner of the 2008 World's Ugliest Dog Contest has passed away.

Courtesy of Perez:

Sad news.

The winner of the 2008 World's Ugliest Dog Contest has passed away.

Gus was a pedigree Chinese crested dog from St. Petersburg, Florida.

He was missing an eye, one leg, and was almost hairless.

Unfortunately, the 9 year-old pooch was suffering from cancer.

Gus was originally rescued from a home where he was being kept inside a crate in someone's garage.

His adoptive family says Gus lost his leg after it had to be amputated due to a skin tumor and he lost his eye in a cat fight.

Evil pussy!

As for Gus' owner, she had said the prize money from the contest was going to be used for his radiation treatment.

Poor pooch.

Rest in peace, Gus!!!!

It's a dogs life being an actor!

Halloween sees not not humans dressing up as fool but also our animal friends. Mondex the chihuahua passed off an impressive impersonation of Hollywood pirate Johnny Depp to win a halloween dog contest. With the credit crunch hitting Hollywood hard rumours are abound that Mondex may well in contest to win the leading role in the next pirates in the caribbean film.

For those readers still pondering the picture above, Johnny Depp is on the right, Mondex on the left. The give away is Johnny's impressive thigh muscles.

World first: dog appears in court - as a witness

A French canine named 'Scooby Doo' has taken after his cartoon namesake by fighting crime. Scooby appeared in the witness box during a court hearing in Nanterre, France, and was able to identify a suspect by barking furiously.

The court was convened in order to see whether a suicide verdict arrived at by police investigating the death of Scooby's owner can be overturned. The owner's family are calling for a full murder inquiry and are hoping that the crime-fighting efforts of Scooby Doo will bring them justice.

The judge in the case complimented Scooby for his "exemplary behaviour and invaluable assistance", while others were left wondering if the French legal system has gone to the dogs.

A source told Animal News: "These French judges are barking mad."

Animal News was not able to confirm whether any other members of Mystery, Inc. will be assisting Scooby in this case.

It's a dog save cat world!

For all those negative types who say that it's each animal for it's self in a crisis, Leo is here to prove you wrong. Dogs do have a more humane side. During a fire in Melborne, Australia. Leo bravely risked his life to save every dogs biggest enemy, the pesky kitten. Whilst the useless humans fled the building leaving behind the cardboard box of defenceless kitty cats, Leo stayed behind until the fire-brigade arrived to save the pussies.

Video available at BBC news

A hare-raising adventure

A hare foetus rescued from its dog-butchered mother is being raised as an orphan by a Hampshire family. And the hare and new owners are sure to become bosom bodies - because 'Miracle' is being housed for warmth in Margi Heath's bra!

The Daily Telegraph reports that originally 'Miracle' and her dead mother were destined to become Sunday lunch:

"The hare was so beautiful, I just couldn't bare [sic] to throw her away. I thought she'd make a nice meal so started gutting her."

So it seems like 'Miracle' truly was just a hare's breadth from death.... but luckily her beating heart was spotted just before she was turned into a nice hearty stew!