Heartless Coppers: "Stop grieving, it's only a chicken!"

From the BBC:

Flowers and tributes were left in an alleyway where the body of a mystery dead baby was found - before police realised it was only a chicken foetus...

Police cordoned off the scene but soon realised that it was not a human but a chicken foetus.

Well-wishers had laid more than a dozen bunches of flowers at the scene, along with cards and teddy bears. One of the cards read: "RIP Little Baby. Safe in the arms of Jesus. From someone who is a loving mother xxxx."

Merseyside Police told the community on Monday to "stop grieving, it's only a chicken".

A spokeswoman for Merseyside Police said: "It seems a member of the public saw the remains of a foetus, which possibly resembled a human foetus, and called us.

"We cordoned off the area to investigate, as we would with any possible suspicious death, but it became apparent it was not a human foetus.

This is very similar to the time a friend of mine saw a toy alien lying on the street and mistook it for a dead human foetus with much alarm!

However, Animal News is left wondering why the good people of Liverpool are not permitted to grieve for a chicken foetus as they would a human one. This anti-animal discrimination has to stop!

Hat tip: Robino

what a stinking animal house

To many of our readers I'm sure it will come of no surprise that our beloved house of commons has turned into something of a rank animal house. The people of the country have been saying for years that parliament is full of inbred animals but a report now show how true that is.

So far this year there have been 79 mouse sightings, 79 fly sightings, and it is believed to home 907 moths, down from 2,507 in May. Animal news calls for a public debate whether the animals should be housed in their own specially built parliament, or may be moved over to Buckingham palace?

Could this be Robin Hood reincarnated as a bear?!

Woburn Safari Park, Bedfordshire, was momentarily transformed into medieval Sherwood Forest when a bear tore a hub cap from one car - in order to give it to a driver whose own hub cap had been stolen.

The giant black bear had initially sparked fear among zoo visitors driving past him when he began tearing at one car's hubcaps.

They didn't realise his efforts, although misguided, were actually aimed at helping others.

Gift in mouth, the animal lumbered over to a woman in a car behind, whose hubcaps had been stolen weeks earlier (at the hands of nasty humans, we presume).

'It put the hubcap down and then banged on the window, as if it was trying to get my attention,' said motorist Azra Noonari.

'It was almost like it wanted to give me the wheel cap.'

Not since the days of fellow forest-dweller Robin Hood have we seen such heartfelt banditry!

War chimp

We at animal news feel that at times of war it is important to remember not only the suffering of humans but also our animal friends. But times of trouble can also be a time of hope and joy at the humanity of some.



Mapima (pictured above) was being abused by Congolese troops, beaten up and starved. Luckily for her a Israeli aid worker Eyal Reinich spotted the distressed primate and arranged her rescue.



Mapima (see below) is now doing well under the supervision of Congolese Institute for the Conservation of Nature (ICCN) trained caregivers. Hurray!

Fat Cats

From Yahoo News:

Eight of Britain's most overweight pets are to embark on a 100-day diet and fitness regime in a bid to be crowned this year's pet fit club champion.

The seven dogs and one cat, who are all more than 30 percent overweight and weigh a combined total of 191 kg (421 lb), were picked by veterinary charity PDSA who are running the slimming contest.

The animals, who need to lose a total of 74 kg to reach their ideal weight, will be put on specially tailored diet and exercise programs.

The pet who achieves the biggest percentage weight loss and best follows their new regime will be crowned champion, winning their owner a pet-friendly holiday.

At the hour of the Credit Crunch, it's apparently not only corporate fat cats that are shedding a few pounds!

UPDATE: Link is now broken, see a copy of the story here.

The purr-plexing love of cats for car engines

Animal News is well aware that cats love to travel - but just why they choose to do it inside bonnets of cars, encased in their engines, is a veritable moggy mystery.

Take Beamer, who suffered horrific burns after spending three days being driven around West Sussex in a BMW. Or misfortunate Mina, who travelled for 30 miles "clinging to the inside of a car bonnet" before being discovered alongside the engine's spark plugs.


Bad luck befell Black Jack, a seven-month old cat who sustained abdominal injuries, a severed Achilles' tendon and a significant loss of muscle tissue after becoming trapped in the fan belt of her neighbour's car. Black Jack required 80 stitches, several operations and eight days in intensive care - but fortunately survived. A fan belt injury also occurred in Rutland, where Lucky

lost much of the skin from the side of his stomach and needed to have a leg amputated after it became trapped in the fan belt.

Halloumi and Mele suffered similar ordeals, as did Maisy - who was discovered when her legs were seen dangling beneath the car. It is said that Maisy

was still deeply traumatised, but was improving.

"Maisy survived a four-mile journey from Abermule to Newtown after becoming trapped in a car engine," she said.

"After the journey her back legs didn't seem to work, but they're back to normal now. She is still deeply traumatised and it's going to be a slow, long journey with lots of tender loving care.

Charlie spent three hours in a car engine journeying from Hull to Norfolk, while in Aberdeen a ginger kitten named Gingi was discovered trapped inside a bonnet after driving for several miles - when the car's owner noticed the engine sounding an unusual purr. Nacho hitched a ride in a car engine all the way from Bristol to Liverpool. But perhaps the most impressive cat-hop was stowaway stray Lucky who, in an act reminiscent of a feline Phileas Fogg, managed to travel all the way from France to England in a car engine, in a journey lasting three days.

But a close second is probably Luna, who survived 300 miles over the course of a week in Austria, trapped inside the bonnet of a Mercedes-Benz - narrowly avoiding a cat-astrophy.

The popularity of engine-dwelling is not limited to cars. Cats have also survived journies trapped inside the engines of a van (in Hampshire), a coach and even a fire service lorry.

It would seem that vehicle engines are simply the purr-fect mode of cat travel! But as this adventurous lifestyle often leaves our feline friends just a whisker from death, it certainly is fortunate that they have nine lives.

Tiger cloning in Korea - the gateway to world domination?

In a rare show of intra-peninsular friendship, the Democratic People's Republic of Korea and the Republic of Korea (more popularly known as North and South Korea, respectively) are joining forces in their quest to clone the rare Mount Paektu Tiger.


This ostensibly ecological project already has a pending European patent.

However, some commentators are concerned that the purpose of this research, so far as the Democratic People's Republic of Korea is concerned, is for scientists to aquire the know-how to embark on a much more sinister cloning attempt.... creating multiple copies of 'Dear Leader' Kim Jong-il.

The recent disappearance of Kim Jong-il, and the subsequent failed attempt at a cover-up featuring the shameless use of Photoshop, has been interpreted by some news sources as an indication that the Dear Leader is in failing health. But Animal News wonders whether this absence from public life is because the North Korean leader is busy being cloned...

Bird got the blues

From the Mail:

Spare a thought for Fred the parrot, who was so heartbroken by the death of his owner that he's been prescribed an animal-friendly version of the anti-depressant.

The African Grey got the blues after owner George Dance's passing - and ended up biting all his neck feathers off before animal experts offered the radical solution.

The bird has now been prescribed a twice-daily liquid dose of a bird-friendly version of Prozac, called Clomicalm.

Other recent cases of animals being given mental health treatment include

collie-Labrador Winnie, who last year was given Clomicalm after being diagnosed with canine separation anxiety.

Sad.

Foreigners attack christmas

A shocking attack on Christmas has been reported in Bath. Rogue American Squirrels have attempted to destroy Christmas after an assault on the rotary club Christmas lights.

Revenge is on the minds of the Rotary club, a member said "they have got our bulbs but we will get their nuts"

A political storm has also been felt after this criminal activity, Mr Daniel Lake, a University of Bath BNP activist (07856 335201) said " this is typical of these Yankee foreign invaders, they have no respect for our culture and traditions, they should be thrown out of the country"

Bizarre friendship frenzy

In the wake of our recent post on unlikely animal friendships, a veritable pandemic of interspecies chumminess has been brought to the attention of Animal News. Be inspired!

tortoise + hippo
An orphaned hippo in kenya has been adopted by a giant tortoise, in a mutually beneficial display of animal friendship. It is said of the tortoise: "motherhood has really brought her out of her shell!"


chimp + tiger cubs
Anjana, a chimpanzee, has adopted two tiger cubs in Florida.



elephant + sheep
From metro:

Themba the abandoned baby elephant has someone to give him that warm, fuzzy feeling at long last – Albert the sheep.

The six-month-old was introduced to Albert, two, after he was orphaned with little hope of survival.

Despite a few teething problems, the two are now best friends, and spend hours playing and cuddling.

dog + monkey
From the New York Post:

It was love at first sight for a puppy and a monkey at a zoo in China.

A worker at the Nanhai Zoo who takes her 6-month-old pooch with her to work noticed the pup and the monkey had an instant attraction.

Now the tiny simian feeds the canine bananas and brushes his hair, and the dog lets his pal ride on his back.

That really is bananas!

dog + kittens
From the wires:

A female dog is nursing a litter of kittens which were orphaned when their mother died in China.

Their owner, Cai, of Jiangmen, said he has been raising cats and dogs together for more than 10 years, and they all got along together well. But this was the first time he had ever seen kittens being nursed by a dog, he told the local Guangzhou Daily.

The four kittens seemed happy and content with their new mother's milk, while the dog was tending to its adopted family with love and care, Cai added.

"Several days ago, the kittens' mother died after eating a poisoned rat, leaving behind a litter of kittens without a source of milk," he said. "The kittens' cries may have stirred the dog's maternal nature, since it too had recently given birth. It volunteered to take over and feed the kittens of its old friend."

The dog's own puppies had been taken away by one of its grown-up offspring. Cai said: "That's perhaps another reason why the dog adopted the kittens. She lost all of her own children."

rabbit + kittens
The BBC reports on Summer the Rabbit, of Aberdeen, who has adopted six three-week old kittens.

Veterinary nurse Melanie Humble says: "the kittens seemed to really like her [Summer] and thought she was their mother. They were trying to get milk from her and climbing over her. And Summer was not bothered by them at all. Summer is five months old and she's gigantic. It is lovely to see them all together."

Hedgehog update

Two hedgehog news nuggets:

A hedgehog has lived to see another day after accidentally undergoing a 40 degrees spin cycle in a washing machine. The aptly named 'Lucky' is now recovering from her ordeal before being returned to the wild. On the upside, Lucky has never been cleaner!



Fellow hedgehog George is probably the fattest hedgehog in the country - weighing in at a whopping 2.2 kg! In fact, George is so overweight that he has now been placed on the Atkins diet. High protein, low carbs - that's the way to do it George!

Stand up for the pub bitch

Progress is slowly being made against the anti-animal discrimination which is rife in the public bars of Britain. Hatty the Lakeland terrier was barred from the Jolly Sailor in Prestatyn accused of chewing the beer mats. However the landlord had a change of mind after anger from regulars.

"I came down one night and all the regulars were throwing beer mats for her so really speaking, we shouldn't be blaming Hatty, we should be blaming the regulars," reported the landlord.

However the landlord now demands poor Hatty should undergo humiliating treatment and wear a high-vis vest whilst in the pub. Amazing animal news is outraged that the dog should undergo this treatment and sugguest that the regulars should be wearing the vests. Please support this cause and join our petition by phoning 0845 600 5705.

Nice Jug!

Check out Robbie the Raccoon, get himself in a spot of bother. A lucky escape we think!

To the big kennel in the sky

The winner of the 2008 World's Ugliest Dog Contest has passed away.

Courtesy of Perez:

Sad news.

The winner of the 2008 World's Ugliest Dog Contest has passed away.

Gus was a pedigree Chinese crested dog from St. Petersburg, Florida.

He was missing an eye, one leg, and was almost hairless.

Unfortunately, the 9 year-old pooch was suffering from cancer.

Gus was originally rescued from a home where he was being kept inside a crate in someone's garage.

His adoptive family says Gus lost his leg after it had to be amputated due to a skin tumor and he lost his eye in a cat fight.

Evil pussy!

As for Gus' owner, she had said the prize money from the contest was going to be used for his radiation treatment.

Poor pooch.

Rest in peace, Gus!!!!

Penguin Petulance

Just take a look at this mischievous penguin! Surely an Animal ASBO is heading his way!

Penguin befriends stuffed toy; rhino pals up with rabbit

In the world of bizarre animal friendships, not since an elephant got chummy with a pig have we seen such an odd pairing as this:



Real life penguin Pingu is blissfully content in his friendship with a £3.99 stuffed toy.

The new found friends are more similar in appearance to characters from a Wallace & Gromit plot than to his real life siblings - but this does not seem to be a problem for big-hearted Pingu, who is willing to accept the stuffed toys without prejudice.

In related news, Umquali the Rhino has developed an unlikely friendship with Robby the Rabbit. According to one zookeeper: "It's not clearly whether their relationship is purely platonic or whether Umquali really has the horn for Robby."

Update: Sell shares and buy Pooh!

"It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like 'What about lunch?' " Winnie The Pooh

Amazing Pooh News! The Pooh sketch we reported as being up for auction with an expected selling price of £20 000 has sold for a whopping, credit crunch busting £31 200!

Narcoleptic goats? It's probably because they spend all day counting sheep!

The National Geographic has some shocking footage of goats with narcolepsy:

Damp Donk!

Emulating the stupid chinese water buffalo that AAN reported on recently, stupid donkey Eeyore (real name), fell down a well recently, prompting yet another deployment of our emergency services to rescue a helpless and hapless creature.

Click here for a chance to see recently rescued and thoroughly depressed Eeyore moping around his paddock.

Keep saying NO to monkey karate

Another shocking case of a monkey being forced into a life of karate has come to the attention of Animal News.

Bouncing Bears!!

Take one tree, one bear, a tranquilizer dart and a trampoline and what do you have? A Bouncing Bear of course!

Tiggers don't like hunny - but £20 k sure is sweet

The BBC reports:

An original sketch of favourite AA Milne character Winnie the Pooh, featuring Tigger and Piglet, is expected to fetch £20,000 at auction.

It's no surprise that punters are set to swarm over this item - EH Shepard's 'Tiggers don't like honey' will bee a fine addition to any collection.

Let's hope the auctioneers don't get stung by the Credit Crunch, Animal News couldn't bear to see Tigger being undervalued.

What a load of Bull

Charlie the Charolais bull had a lucky escape recently when he found himself stranded on a Cornwall Cliff. A full scale operation involving the Royal Navy, RSPCA and Coast guard was put into action, and £10 000 later the brave bovine beast was winched to safety!

Give this octopus an asbo!

• juggling hermit crabs
• trying to smash open his aquarium with a rock
• feng shui against the wishes of tankmates
• causing blackouts with well aimed water jets...

...all in a day's anti-social behaviour for Otto the Octopus.